written by those that have been through it



Read up on fii.


Understand, sadly having a diagnosis doesn't protect you.


Gather all your documents in a file for each child and have photographic evidence where appropriate.


Keep a symptom/reaction diary. This will make it easier if they do come calling.


Secretly record all meetings, this is for your own protection and use. You have the legal right. You won't believe how stories change when/if this kicks off. You also won't believe how some consultants talk to patients.

Never use medical terms


Understand that if you are accused the school will be keeping notes on your conversations


If your child is called into do a period of observation then be aware that they are maybe looking at you as the cause as well as other possibilities.



Only answer questions you are asked, don't volunteer information, don't be scared of silence.


Do not use medical terms, if you need to all ways dr so and so says. It’s never your opinion.


Get ADVICE before choosing a lawyer and always use one from OUTSIDE your area 


Find a good legal 


Never communicate with the social worker by text. It can’t be used as evidence in court. Always ask the to use email.

Identify strong support incase you need to put forward alternative carer's


 what to expect:


If Social Services turn up on your doorstep without an appointment you have a right to refuse them entry. But do show your child through the window.


Ask the Social Services to phone in advance to make an appointment which is mutually convenient.


Arrange the meeting so that you can have a friend or advocate with you.


Only answer questions you are asked, don't volunteer information, don't be scared of silence.


Do not try and make friends, treat the meeting like a business meeting.


Never sign a section 20


Make sure your home is clean and tidy with fresh food in the fridge. The social worker will ask to see the children's bedrooms.


Make sure there are age appropriate toys on view.


Always be open to any suggestions they make, never appear to not be willing to comply with their strategies


Know your children's rights: in that SS will need to talk to your child without you present but your child doesnt have to be alone with them, your child has the right to an advocate or a trusted adult to be with them.



Talk to your family/partner, they will understand

After reading your reports or notes remember it can take a couple of days to recover, give yourself time.


Your extended family - siblings etc might not understand - be careful - family relationships can be easily fractured by this kind of stress 


Make sure your Facebook and other social media is set to secret. Consider disguising your name in some way.


Join us on fb:



Write a list of people on your side, friends, family, professionals, put it somewhere you can see it to remind yourself you are not alone.

Remember you know the truth


Be kind to yourself, you will be in shock

We have more in depth advice available please contact fiightback for a copy